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Does this happen to anyone at work???

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Joined: Mar 14, 2006
Posts: 15
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Posted Mar 14, 2006 at 9:57:32 AM
Subject: Does this happen to anyone at work???

I'm not sure if this is a huge issue or if its that important. Does anyone feel like people hate you at work or think you are stupid? I'm getting so much mental abuse now that I dont know if I should file for harassment or just find another job. People here think I'm stupid, or they expect me to learn something in a given time frame.

Another thing that I get overally depressed about. All these company lunches or parties, makes me feel soooooooo uncomfortable. But if I do get invited, I feel good, but if I dont get invited I feel bad. So when I go to these lunches/parties, I feel so bad and lonely. I guess I have poor communication and social skills. The HR manager was telling me if I can do my job, then I dont have LD? WOW I thought that was an ignorant comment. Theres just so much favoritsm here.

Ok if a co worker goes out of town for vacation, and then comes back everyone asks that person how their trip was. But yet when I go on vacation no one asks me how my trip was. They get hugs and laughter, and I am just sitting here now crying as I type this. Also in late 2004, my grandfather was really ill with congestive heart failure and pneumonia, again no one at work asked me how he was doing, but another co worker, her mom was same age as my grandpa and had the same illness, but yet people asked her how her mom was doing.

I dont get why people treat me like this.

Anna

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Amber
Joined Jan 16, 2004
Posts: 74

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Posted:Mar 14, 2006 10:24:28 AM

Just recently I quit a temporary job as on the fourth day on the job the boss berated me right there in front of the customers, then did the same in front of my coworkers. When i was trying to ask about something wrong with the cash register the boss looked at me like 'You stupid idiot!" and said "Well you had three days to learn this you should know by now!" The elderly lady I was helping out even scolded her for it and I just felt like crying. Then that night she wanted me to stay another two hours to clean up and I told her I have a ride coming so I'll have to call them and tell them to wait until 11PM to come and not 9PM when my shift was supposed to end. She blew up in front of my coworkers and yelled "Well you should have done that on your break!", and when I told her I didn't expect her to keep me another two hours she said "OH JUST GO AND GET OUT OF HERE!" as if I were just some idiot. Now I hope when I find a better and permanent job (as I was to only be there for three weeks to a month and it wasn't worth the attitude from the supervisor) where I will be recognized for my hard work and not every little mistake I make.

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luvsterriers
Joined Mar 14, 2006
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Posted:Mar 14, 2006 10:33:13 AM


WOW that was verbal harassment. Bosses like that shouldnt even be bosses at all. You get that all the time at jobs. Its like LD people are stupid, but we are NOT. You cant expect a LD person to learn something in 3 days. WOW I mean it doesnt take 3 days to learn the cash register. It took me maybe a month while I worked at a Staples. I couldnt figure out how to put the tape in the cash register, so I had to ask someone. Sometimes they would sigh. I didnt know how to handle a check or a return. Cash Registers are hard to understand. But no one should demand that you stay 2 hours over. I'm sorry you had that mean boss. That boss should be FIRED!

Anna

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Joe Tag
Joined Apr 20, 2014
Posts: 102

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Posted:Mar 14, 2006 1:15:06 PM

It always took me a long time to count-out the cash register, when I worked retail (computers and PC software store, a Department Store, a sporting goods store (all separate occassions)).

There is so much we have to remember. Our "recall" may not be as fast as others.

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Amber
Joined Jan 16, 2004
Posts: 74

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Posted:Mar 14, 2006 4:07:29 PM

The problem is in the training video it said that you could probably get the hang of the register after two weeks. Already I had some talent in doing some things with the register as this was an upscale department store so about everyone used credit or ATM cards. It was when a lady asked for a cash return ( something that in my four days working there I hadn't done before) my mind freezed and my boss threw a little fit. I don't think it was part of my LD as I was tired from the night before as I caught the bus late and wasn't home until 12AM. The schedule was one of those where the hours are not steady so some days I was working in the morning to noon then other times noon to closing. I don't mind working late just as long as I'm told the day before, or at least the morning that I work.

Anyway I had put some applications at other places at the mall where the department store I was working in was, and as after the bosse's first blow up with me I decided that on my hour long lunch break I should check to see if they still had my applications on hand. Luckily the art gallery people still have mine and told me they will call me in two weeks. Hopefully I'll be working there as I've worked in an art gallery before so I know what to expect.

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Sue
Joined Jun 14, 2003
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Posted:Mar 14, 2006 4:26:03 PM

Do you realize you're doing a great job of making sure you feel as bad as possible?
Keeping *score* of how well people treat others vs. how they treat you... are they worth your time doing that? Does it help anything?
You can't change how other people treat you... yea, I know this sounds like Oprah, but the only thing you can change is how **you** act. They're not worth crying over a keyboard over...

Sue J, webmastress www.resourceroom.net

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Amber
Joined Jan 16, 2004
Posts: 74

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Posted:Mar 14, 2006 9:02:23 PM

Sue,

Even if we did not have LD's there's the idea that there should be mutual respect between an employee and their supervisors. My job at the college's art gallery was demanding- and my supervisor was demanding- but she never acted unprofessionally in front of co-workers or clients like the supervisor at the department store did. Also if you had questions you could talk to the gallery supervisor at any time she was in her office, and if you had to work overtime she would ask you the day before rather than saying "Well why don't we stay longer?" at the last minute. I'm not whining about everything I'm just saying even if I didn't have an LD ( I didn't even get the chance to mention my LD's as the store was rushing to hire temps for the closing out sales and didn't ask about accomodations as they hired me on the spot) this supervisor was not acting appropriately. When she yelled at me even one of my male co-workers ( bless his heart when my supervisor was not around he showed me everything she hadn't got the chance to train me on) looked like he really hurt for me as he saw how hard I had been working. I'll bet he reported her to her superiors.

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luvsterriers
Joined Mar 14, 2006
Posts: 15

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Posted:Mar 14, 2006 9:39:38 PM

Quote dcb9f0c9f1="Sue":

Do you realize you're doing a great job of making sure you feel as bad as possible?
Keeping *score* of how well people treat others vs. how they treat you... are they worth your time doing that? Does it help anything?
You can't change how other people treat you... yea, I know this sounds like Oprah, but the only thing you can change is how **you** act. They're not worth crying over a keyboard over...


Yes I know that no one can change the way the other person's act.
Mom even told me that co workers who dont ask me how my trip went, and welcoming me back by hugging or laughing, is not important. But why does it bother me so?

Shouldnt co workers treat everyone equal and with respect? Harassment, teasing, is all wrong.

Anna

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Amber
Joined Jan 16, 2004
Posts: 74

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Posted:Mar 14, 2006 10:05:41 PM

You're right about a lot of stuff, but I'm not keeping score on how people treat me it's just this was a situation which I never came across at any of the other places I worked at. I knew she was acting unprofessional compared to supervisors in the past, and that was all I was saying. I don't need pity- I just wanted to be respected in return as I had already worked hard 10 hours that day. At least I got a lot of compliments from my customers that for a new person I'm doing great.

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Joe Tag
Joined Apr 20, 2014
Posts: 102

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Posted:Mar 14, 2006 10:21:19 PM

Everyone --- let us take a breath. OK?
It gets down to --- What are the "Essential Job Functions" of the job you are doing? Amber --- take a breath. What do you want to do for work? where do you want to do it? What education do you have? What educational requirements are required for the job you want?
If you can answer ( to yourself) these questions, you are on the right path. &lt;br&gt;
I have problems of my own. I am trying to cope with 16 bosses; one being a secretary and 15 being College Professors. They are all "arrogant princes" who think you can help them (each) within 5 minutes; one after another. IT DOES NOT WORK THAT WAY. One boss, I log-into their email (at their request); and print out the email, and send email for them --- BECAUSE THAT PROFF. DOES NOT *KEYBOARD*. Plus, lives 2 hours from the university, and has a college educated kid living with, who can do *ALL* email (share college email responsibilities). The professor is a former Department Chair!

So, I am looking for work elsewere.

Yes, I have been challenged, and they know my LD issues; yet sometimes they forget (and sometimes they don't care). &lt;br&gt;
Hang in there. Peace to you, and Sue, and Amber, and LuvsTerriers.

--- end ---

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luvsterriers
Joined Mar 14, 2006
Posts: 15

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Posted:Mar 15, 2006 11:01:09 AM

Yes my employer knows that I have LD, but I believe that they dont care or they forget as well.

Joe.tag, Amber I hope you find a better job.


Just today, I was crying again of course not in the office, but in the bathroom. When someone makes me cry, I want to get out of office, and go in bathroom or go in my car or just outside. Ok I'm covering up front, answering phones, since the receptionist is on spring break. (She works here part time, since she's in college full time) So this customer calls and asks to speak with someone in Accounts Payable, so I told her that he's not in right now, but do you want his voice mail? She said she didnt want voice mail, but if theres anyone in payroll that she can talk to. But he was on another line, so I told her he's on another line. Then she gave me her number and the information she wanted. She wanted to come by the office to pick up a check, instead of accounting sending it to her. So Ok I write all this down. What I learned, is you ALWAYS want to make the customer happy, and always listen to their requests. So I hand this over to the Accountant (He deals with all of our checks, He's Comptroller) He's the supervisor for the two men Accounts Payable/Accounts Receivable. Well he just says in a nasty attitude, "I dont know her, so why did you give you me this information?" I was shaking and almost crying and said to him "Well I want to make the customer happy, and she requested to speak with anyone in payroll." Then he says "Well she asked for the Accounts Payable guy first, who is she the Account Payable's wife?" Then I just walked out and said that you are making me feel uncomfortable. Is this abuse, harassment, or just me being stupid?

I KNOW to make the customer happy, and always be patient and kind with them. Thats just how it is. I did retail for 4 years at a department store, so I definitely know to treat the customers with respect. I dont know what his problem is. But why do I feel uncomfortable in talking to the HR, who's my boss? I told her because I'm afraid that she favors the Comptroller. They always should listen to both sides of the conflict, and then come to conclusion.

Anna

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Joe Tag
Joined Apr 20, 2014
Posts: 102

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Posted:Mar 15, 2006 1:47:49 PM

Quote "luvsterriers":

Yes my employer knows that I have LD, but I believe that they dont care or they forget as well.

Quote "luvsterriers":

Joe.tag, Amber I hope you find a better job.

Quote "luvsterriers":


Just today, I was crying again of course not in the office, but in the bathroom. When someone makes me cry, I want to get out of office, and go in bathroom or go in my car or just outside. Ok I'm covering up front, answering phones, since the receptionist is on spring break. (She works here part time, since she's in college full time) So this customer calls and asks to speak with someone in Accounts Payable, so I told her that he's not in right now, but do you want his voice mail? She said she didnt want voice mail, but if theres anyone in payroll that she can talk to. But he was on another line, so I told her he's on another line. Then she gave me her number and the information she wanted. She wanted to come by the office to pick up a check, instead of accounting sending it to her. So Ok I write all this down. What I learned, is you ALWAYS want to make the customer happy, and always listen to their requests.

Quote "luvsterriers":

&lt;br&gt;------ Stop right there.
So I hand this over to the Accountant (He deals with all of our checks, He's Comptroller) He's the supervisor for the two men Accounts Payable/Accounts Receivable. Well he just says in a nasty attitude, "I dont know her, so why did you give you me this information?" I was shaking and almost crying and said to him "Well I want to make the customer happy, and she requested to speak with anyone in payroll." Then he says "Well she asked for the Accounts Payable guy first, who is she the Account Payable's wife?" Then I just walked out and said that you are making me feel uncomfortable. Is this abuse, harassment, or just me being stupid?

Quote "luvsterriers":

I KNOW to make the customer happy, and always be patient and kind with them. Thats just how it is. I did retail for 4 years at a department store, so I definitely know to treat the customers with respect. I dont know what his problem is. But why do I feel uncomfortable in talking to the HR, who's my boss? I told her because I'm afraid that she favors the Comptroller. They always should listen to both sides of the conflict, and then come to conclusion.

Quote "luvsterriers":

Anna

&lt;br&gt;
Anna ---
You should have stopped right there. You should have arranged for the phone note you took to be delivered to the Payroll or Accounts Payable person; whomever is there soonest. Seems like the Accountant (Chief Financial Officer) thought you were making a big deal out of it.
Usually, a request like this is handled by that assigned department (in this case payroll or Accounts Payable). Seems like the Accountant did not want to be bothered, did not need to know about this. Only if the two guys in Accounting (payables) were out did the Accountant (CFO) need to know. I would have xeroxed my phone note, and left the copy for the Accounts Payable guy; original phone note for Payroll.
&lt;br&gt;
I have learned, somepeople will use information they store (you have shared) that could get you in trouble, or make life more difficult than it has to be. Don't let that CFO / Accountant get to you. I would avoid him, for a while, and if you see him, just say "Hello" and walk on by.
&lt;br&gt; Take care.

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luvsterriers
Joined Mar 14, 2006
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Posted:Mar 15, 2006 2:22:24 PM

He's the only reason I want to quit. He constantly makes me cry, and no employee has ever done that to me. Also sometimes I have no clue which call a employee handles. Some callers ask for something, that I have no clue about, but the HR manager just told me that I have to learn?! No matter how many times I told her my problems, its like she expects me to do it at HER time. Does anyone have problems transferring phone calls?


Joe I wrote on the phone message (Comptroller or Accounts Payable) since it was for either or. He didnt have to have that nasty attitude. Someone told me that I did what I had to do, because it was the customer's request, and if he had an attitude thats his problem and not mine, because I was doing my job.
Anna

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Joe Tag
Joined Apr 20, 2014
Posts: 102

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Posted:Mar 16, 2006 11:00:16 AM

OK, A couple of thiings....

&gt;&gt; You wrote that the caller asked for Payroll or Accounts Payable.
So, thats who you give the phone message to.
The Accountant does not need to see the phone message unless and until
Payroll Guy or Accounts Payable Guy are absent when the customer shows up to pick up their check.

&gt;&gt; I would avoid Mr. Accountant, and give him wide berth (space).
If you see him in the all, be civil, and say "Hello." If he stops by
your work area, you can acknowledge him. If he says anything more to you, be civil and polite. "I am doing OK; I'm getting advice and more information from my coworkers" . That's it. Then, re-focus on your work.

&gt;&gt; Regarding callers, you need to find out if they have dealt with someone in the comany ( or which office ) they have dealt with before, and then transfer the call there. Otherwise, find out where you should transfer most calls. Try using the phone to put the caller on hold; then use the intercom to ask another person (your boss?) who handles which issue. Then, the caller you have on hold, pick up the line, tell them what you are going do do, and then transfer the call to the right person.
** What I have just written, is what your supervisor should have done.
*** Question: You are not working with a Vocational Rehabilitaiton agency? Linking up with them might help. ***
* NOTE: Your boss might get the hint, quickly, that a briefing-training meeting about who handles which issues might help you.
ALWAYS HAVE PAPER AND PEN CLOSE BY / AT HAND.

&gt;&gt; After 3 days of following my advice about dealing with the Accountant, and giving you a hard time, and he still bothers you, you may need to speak with a supervisor that both of you have in common. If you don't know who that is, find out.

In any case, you have to take care of yourself, and be a good employee.
In my job, I try to do that; and it is difficult at times.

&gt;&gt; Regarding your question about tranferring phone calls, all of my Full-Time professors have voicemail; that REDUCES the need to take phone messages for them, and more often for the Adjunct Professors(part-time).

Good luck. Keep us posted next week. March 23--March 24--March 25.


&lt;br&gt; --- end --- &lt;br&gt;

Quote 72e30ae281="luvsterriers":

He's the only reason I want to quit. He constantly makes me cry, and no employee has ever done that to me. Also sometimes I have no clue which call a employee handles. Some callers ask for something, that I have no clue about, but the HR manager just told me that I have to learn?! No matter how many times I told her my problems, its like she expects me to do it at HER time. Does anyone have problems transferring phone calls?

Quote 72e30ae281="luvsterriers":


Joe I wrote on the phone message (Comptroller or Accounts Payable) since it was for either or. He didnt have to have that nasty attitude. Someone told me that I did what I had to do, because it was the customer's request, and if he had an attitude thats his problem and not mine, because I was doing my job.
Anna

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luvsterriers
Joined Mar 14, 2006
Posts: 15

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Posted:Mar 16, 2006 11:35:28 AM

Joe-tag

Accountant IS the Comptroller and Payroll. We call him Comptroller, sometimes Payroll Dept.

I have a appointment with Dept of Rehab Services next week. I have written down all of the things that has happened since I been here. Someone suggested DRS to help me. I hope and pray that things will work out in the end.

I was that customer at one time. I had a urgent need to talk to my college piano professor, but he wasnt available, so I told the receptionist if theres anyone that can help me, maybe another piano professor? So she finds another piano professor to help me, and there were NO arguments between this professor and the receptionist. The professor helped me with my problem, NOT once did he ever say "Oh Anna you arent my student, sorry I cant help you."

Anna

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Joe Tag
Joined Apr 20, 2014
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Posted:Mar 16, 2006 12:53:41 PM

Anna --
What you wrote before, what you write now, are too different things.
From what you wrote, I thought there were three men involved in the situation. You needed to be more clear.
Good luck with DRS. By the way, I like Fairfax, VA. They have a
better mass-transit system than where I live. I went to a conference at GMU in summer 2001; took busses all the way. I was impressed.

Take care. /signed/ Joe Tag .

Quote "luvsterriers":

Joe-tag

Quote "luvsterriers":

Accountant IS the Comptroller and Payroll. We call him Comptroller, sometimes Payroll Dept.

Quote "luvsterriers":

I have a appointment with Dept of Rehab Services next week. I have written down all of the things that has happened since I been here. Someone suggested DRS to help me. I hope and pray that things will work out in the end.

Quote "luvsterriers":

I was that customer at one time. I had a urgent need to talk to my college piano professor, but he wasnt available, so I told the receptionist if theres anyone that can help me, maybe another piano professor? So she finds another piano professor to help me, and there were NO arguments between this professor and the receptionist. The professor helped me with my problem, NOT once did he ever say "Oh Anna you arent my student, sorry I cant help you."

Quote "luvsterriers":

Anna

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luvsterriers
Joined Mar 14, 2006
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Posted:Mar 16, 2006 1:00:22 PM

I went to GMU and majored in music. Great school. I may want to go back and get a Masters. Sorry for the confusion.

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Joe Tag
Joined Apr 20, 2014
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Posted:Mar 17, 2006 8:57:35 AM

Quote "luvsterriers":

I went to GMU and majored in music. Great school. I may want to go back and get a Masters. Sorry for the confusion.

&lt;br&gt; I will send you a Private Message that will help you, in future. &lt;br&gt;

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Sue
Joined Jun 14, 2003
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Posted:Mar 20, 2006 12:24:08 PM

Did I hear right at GMU is going to the Sweet Sixteen? (Our ILlini have, alas, fallen... hey, at least we're in good company 'cause a lot of folks got UPSET over the weekend :-))

Sue J, webmastress www.resourceroom.net

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luvsterriers
Joined Mar 14, 2006
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Posted:Mar 21, 2006 8:52:28 AM
Subject:??

Sweet Sixteen? :?

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Joe Tag
Joined Apr 20, 2014
Posts: 102

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Posted:Mar 21, 2006 11:08:23 AM

Quote 493ef9cc7f="Sue":

Did I hear right at GMU is going to the Sweet Sixteen? (Our ILlini have, alas, fallen... hey, at least we're in good company 'cause a lot of folks got UPSET over the weekend :-))

---

Anna Luvs Terriers ---

She is referring to a basketball series tournament. Leads to
"Final Four" (final four teams to qualify for College Basketball Championship).

Regards,

Joe Tag

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