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Parenting a Child with LD or ADHD

Making and keeping friends with LD


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Joined: Nov 03, 2005
Posts: 69138
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Posted Feb 15, 2002 at 6:40:34 PM
Subject: Making and keeping friends with LD


Does any one have any advice for my daughter who can't seem to make or keep any friends. She has Sensory integration dysfunction and is a slower learner (she has difficulty in basic math skills and spelling). She doesn't always pick up on social cues and she is easily fustrated and lashes out inappropriately. She is immature socially because of her LD but I don't know how to help her make and keep friends at school. Any ideas? Thanks.

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Anonymous
Joined Dec 22, 2014
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Posted:Feb 15, 2002 8:10:28 PM

I don't have the answer -- but I'm looking into it. I am going through the same thing and its quite painful. Switching my child to a small private school helped, but we still have issues. He no longer is bullyed and the school day is much quieter and more nuturing for him. Bullying is devasating to any kid, let alone a kid with an LD.

I haven't read, but am going to buy the book "The Out of Sync Child."

I know that there are private learning centers, and private therapy centers for LD children that have classes in social skills for LD kids. For example, www.lifeskillscenter.com lists their services, including social classes.

There was also tapes on the site when you click on LD store. "Last One Picked First One Picked On." I watched a preview and it looked good.

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Anonymous
Joined Dec 22, 2014
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Posted:Feb 16, 2002 8:46:06 AM

Thanks for your reply. The book the out of sync child is wonderful. Our SI ot recommended it and it was very helpful. Just a quick FYI. My daughter just entered the public school system from a small private school. At first the small classes were helpful but the teachers were less qualified to handle an ld kid. They didn't understand her issues and saw them manifiest themselves as behavioral issues. Not right away it took about 6 months before the teachers and kids saw any differences. It also took about 6 months in her new public school. The difference is that their are other LD kids at the public school and they seem to be more in tune with her issues and genuinely trying to help. I'm going to check out the life skills center.com. Thanks for the tip. By the way when their were fewer kids in her class and the same kids each year things socially were better. Lori

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Anonymous
Joined Dec 22, 2014
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Posted:Feb 16, 2002 10:00:08 AM
Subject:Re: SI

I bet your SI OT would be really helpful with suggestions for the social issues.

Wondering if you did any therapy for the sensory integration.

Also, how did you find your OT? Was it through a private practice, or a children's hospital? I know that not all OT's are trained in SI.

Glad to hear the public school is trying to work with you. It's possible you'll have a better experience. Just make sure they take the action they say they will. We went from an excellent public school, to a terrible one. The public school we were in did not care about bullying. They ignored it. They had 100 kids on the playground and 2 aides. On rainy days, they left the kids in the classrooms for recess with 1 aide in the hallway monitoring 3 rooms. There was tons of bullying. What a disgrace.

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Anonymous
Joined Dec 22, 2014
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Posted:Feb 16, 2002 5:20:47 PM
Subject:Re: SI

We found our OT who is trained in SI from SI international. Our OT is from braintree rehab. Unfortunately insurance doesn't pay for enough therapy and she is always rushed for time and not doing a thorough enough job with the SI therapy and the coordination with the school etc. to be of much help with the social issues but thanks for the tip. I agree that our school system wouldn't be good enough with the monitoring on the playground if I weren't on top of things all of the time. I guess their aren't any easy answers.

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Anonymous
Joined Dec 22, 2014
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Posted:Feb 21, 2002 11:46:40 AM

Lori,

I know how you feel! my daughter has the same issues. It is very painful when I see her make social mistakes and then she doesn't understand why she dosen't get invited to parties. It's VERY hard on the child AND the parent! I feel for you. We finally went ahead and started taking her to a pychologist. So far it looks like it's going to help alot. I recomend seeing someone if your worried about her mental health. Our daughter was actually getting very depressed from all the rejection and frustrations of trying to fit in. We found that depressoin in childern shows itself very different from adults. Instead the depression comes out in anger. The older she has gotten the worse it has gotten. Shes in the 5th grade now. The childs pain becomes your pain and either of you can afford that. There are some good books on the subject that you could probably find on this broad or the bookstore too. How old is your daughter? Is she in a self contained special ed class? or is she mainstreamed? We very recently put her in a self contained class and so far thats helping as well. She feels much better being around kids who are more like her.

hope this helps...

Janinekay

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Anonymous
Joined Dec 22, 2014
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Posted:Feb 21, 2002 8:55:57 PM

Thanks a lot for your message. My daughter is in third grade and we are going to have her see a psychologist too. How long before you saw some benefits from seeing them? My daughter is still mainstreamed and because she's able to compensate for her ld with a lot of outside help, there is little chance of her being in a class with kids that are more like her. Do you have names of any books on social skills that you found helpful? Also any advise on this scenerio. A Mother of a girl in my daughter;s class (that used to be her friend )told me that when she's friendly with my daughter the other girls exclude her and that its too painful to be her friend. Any advise would be greatly appreciated.

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Anonymous
Joined Dec 22, 2014
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Posted:Feb 21, 2002 8:55:58 PM

Thanks a lot for your message. My daughter is in third grade and we are going to have her see a psychologist too. How long before you saw some benefits from seeing them? My daughter is still mainstreamed and because she's able to compensate for her ld with a lot of outside help, there is little chance of her being in a class with kids that are more like her. Do you have names of any books on social skills that you found helpful? Also any advise on this scenerio. A Mother of a girl in my daughter;s class (that used to be her friend )told me that when she's friendly with my daughter the other girls exclude her and that its too painful to be her friend. Any advise would be greatly appreciated.

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