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Behavior: Social Skills, Self Esteem

voted hardest worker in class but still failing


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Joined: Nov 03, 2005
Posts: 69140
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Posted Mar 14, 2001 at 12:00:01 AM
Subject: voted hardest worker in class but still failing

HELP i'am so scared that my 7 year old daughter is not going to pass the first grade. She is a very hard worker and tries 100%, but she is just not getting it.She gets home from school and all she wants to do is more school work. I write math problems and she is always coloring and writing things.Despite all this her writing and coloring is very sloppy. She has a speach problem which is not helping things either. Which may contribute to her poor social skills.She cant seem to get things from her brain to paper. Concentration and staying focused on something is hard.Even if we are out in public at a resturant for example I have to keep reminding her to eat she gets distracted watching other people. Iam meeting with the school guidance cousler next week.Iam not sure what scares my more, them finding something wrong, or NOT finding something wrong. If anyone has any tips on where to start to figure out whats wrong I would be greatfull. THANKS

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Anonymous
Joined Jul 31, 2014
Posts: 69140

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Posted:Mar 14, 2001 12:00:01 AM

: Talking to the school guidance counselor is a great start. If you have a family doctor, you could talk to the doctor as well.The school may suggest having your daughter take some educational tests to see if they can begin to understand why school is so hard for her. Schools can also get some speech therapy for her.If your daughter is a hard worker, she's already learned one of life's most valuable lessons.HELP i'am so scared that my 7 year old daughter is not going to pass
: the first grade. She is a very hard worker and tries 100%, but she
: is just not getting it.She gets home from school and all she wants
: to do is more school work. I write math problems and she is always
: coloring and writing things.Despite all this her writing and
: coloring is very sloppy. She has a speach problem which is not
: helping things either. Which may contribute to her poor social
: skills.She cant seem to get things from her brain to paper.
: Concentration and staying focused on something is hard.Even if we
: are out in public at a resturant for example I have to keep
: reminding her to eat she gets distracted watching other people.
: Iam meeting with the school guidance cousler next week.Iam not
: sure what scares my more, them finding something wrong, or NOT
: finding something wrong. If anyone has any tips on where to start
: to figure out whats wrong I would be greatfull. THANKS

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Anonymous
Joined Jul 31, 2014
Posts: 69140

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Posted:Mar 14, 2001 12:00:01 AM

We went through a similiar situation last year with my first grader, and it was a most difficult time. It was questionable that he would pass to second grade. I can relate to your fears of knowing or not knowing there is something wrong. Our first step was to obtain private testing and evaluation at a Children's Hospital after talking to our pediatrician. This was because we did not want to wait for the school system to give us answers. Their testing process took months and we wanted to get right on it. We did let the School do their own testing, but were glad we had our own private results which did indicate some learing disorders. Their testing did not, but we were able to get Special Ed. services because of our private test results. Then we obtained a private tutor immediately.(one hour per week) The sooner intervention begins the better. We also undertook weekly therapy sessions with a local counselor for low self-esteem and anxiety issues (for our son) We also obtained Speech Therapy for our son.Additionally, I educated myself mainly through ldonline.com and chat board. Hence, I was more prepared to deal with the school. I knew to request particular tests, copies of results in advance of meetings, classroom accomodations etc. The school was becoming abit fearful of me and even had the district supervisor attend the IEP meeting to shore up their defenses!A little knowledge goes a long way to getting the help you will need for your child! If you know there is a problem, get on it and don't wait for the school "professionals" to tell you.I am happy to say that my son, now a second grader, is doing MUCH better in school and feeling better about himself. He does not say he is "stupid" and hit himself in the head as much as he used to.He continues to receive tutoring one day after school, bi-weely counseling and is included in the Special Ed. program. He is soaring in reading and was recently named the top score in his class in the Accelerated Reading Program. This is a kid who could not read last Febuary! By the way, he is also a HARD WORKER and this really makes a difference. He has an older sister who is quite gifted, but lazy. Guess who will be the success story here?I believe that you, as the parent, need to take matters into your own hands. Don't wait for the schools to step in. Get your child evaluated immediately, and put together your own set of interventions. The earlier the better. Give it a year and perhaps, you will be fortuate to be seeing the improvements we have. Best of luck!Sue

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Anonymous
Joined Jul 31, 2014
Posts: 69140

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Posted:Mar 14, 2001 12:00:01 AM

: HELP i'am so scared that my 7 year old daughter is not going to pass
: the first grade. She is a very hard worker and tries 100%, but she
: is just not getting it.She gets home from school and all she wants
: to do is more school work. I write math problems and she is always
: coloring and writing things.Despite all this her writing and
: coloring is very sloppy. She has a speach problem which is not
: helping things either. Which may contribute to her poor social
: skills.She cant seem to get things from her brain to paper.
: Concentration and staying focused on something is hard.Even if we
: are out in public at a resturant for example I have to keep
: reminding her to eat she gets distracted watching other people.
: Iam meeting with the school guidance cousler next week.Iam not
: sure what scares my more, them finding something wrong, or NOT
: finding something wrong. If anyone has any tips on where to start
: to figure out whats wrong I would be greatfull. THANKSReply: There is a chance that your child may learn differently than the other students in her classroom. There are numerous different learning styles and each child has his or her own or a combination of learning styles. This does not mean that your child is not as smart as the other children. It only means that she will need to use different strategies to reach the same goals. Different people have different ways of doing things and learning is no exception. My boyfriend and I travel to Asheville, NC on a regular basis and I take a different route to get there than he does. We both get there safely and in the same amount of time but we take different paths to reach our destination. What works for one child may not work for another. The most important thing to do is to find a path or strategy to accomplish the goal. The longer your child goes without using strategies that work for her the farther she will fall behind. You should ask your child’s teacher to try using several different methods of teaching to see which one works best for your child. If this does not work then your child’s teacher will refer you and your child to the school counselor to explore other options or to begin the process of testing for special education services. If your child is eligible for special education this does not mean that your child will be isolated from the rest of the school population. Special education is now focused on moving toward an inclusive environment as opposed to an isolated setting. In other words, your child will be placed with regular ed. students as much as possible and special ed. will only provide service and assistance when necessary. The special education department will help your child find strategies that will work for her if it is determined that she needs these services.

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