Tell me what you think!

Hi everyone,

Im a 16 year old male living here in St. Petersburg, Florida.
I am actually from Europe, moved to the U.S. in June of 1995.Coming here was very scary but it was a dream I always had to come to America. I arrived on Delta
flight 257. The major problem was at that time that I did not speak any english. Added to that, I just came from a country in Europe where I lived in a war for a full
year. One word really describes me at that time, I was emotionaly terrified of everything, I was scared to get in a car, when I saw cops I would shake thinking they
were communist soldiers. Let me not even forget my sleeping schedule was of the normal road. Month passed and Im aready in elementary school. First day of
school, my headache was so bad that I felt like it was going to blow up, was crying and missed my country. About 2 or 3 months into the school year, one day all the
sudden something just happened in my mind, all the sudden I just blossomed in my english skills. The teachers thought I was the next Einstein, for me I just saw that I
had broken that wall in between me and the American kids. In middle school, I had OK grades, still in ESOL (English Speakers of Other Languages). In seventh
grade the Spanish teacher asked me why I'm not taking spanish as my foreign language. I gave it a thought for a few days and rejected the idea, I just wasn't ready to
do that. Following year in eighth grade I took Spanish 1, really enjoyed learning the language, to my surprise it wasnt real hard as long as I did my homework each
night and was in class daily, which was not my problem. I passed the class with a B average. As it got towards the end of the year, I noticed some little clues every
now and then. I could not tell the difference between "b" and
"d". My name is Slobodan, couple of times I remember noticing writing my name on paper I would get real confused and hard to understand and know what "b" and
"d" were, I didnt know the difference between the two. So I said to myself, thats just because Im tired. Again and again the same problem kept reoccuring, plus in
math class when it came time to take notes for example; the teacher would write 9 on the board, and I would write "R" for 9 on my paper. That scared me to death, I
thought I was insane or something. Till this day, I still have the same problem happen to me almost each day in math class. In english class I always get terrible
headaches, nausea and dizziness. I find it real weird. I just love to write, and my career goal is broadcast journalism. But yet I write words backwards, most often the
word "saw" I write "was".It just makes me feel stupid, I dont think its because I know 3 languages. In english I love to read especially when the teacher needs
volunteers to read, she always chooses me, I have good pronounciation just like the other 99% of the American students in class. But yet, I would read the whole
story and get confused with characters and have no clue about what I just read. My brain just cant summarize it.
Just yesterday I underwent tests, finally the diagnosis is Dyslexia. It didnt make me feel mad, sad or anything, I felt sort of happy to tell you the truth.
Before that I did my own little private research about Dyslexia online, and in 1997 when Ennis Cosby was murdered I read all about his same problems that he had in
life, but he saw it in a positive way, which he has made me learn to coupe the same way. He is my role model that I cant see through my eyes, but I see in spirits,
Ennis is my inspiration. Just like he said tests in school dont reflect his knowledge personaly. Talking about tests, in school tests are what counts the most towards my
grades. I study real hard and try every possible strategy.Homework is not even a relection of the grades that I get in many of my subjects. If the grade depended on
only homework and classwork, I would at least get B's. With the tests'they knock my grades down so deep that I feel like there is no use to do homework since I have
to do well on the tests and a letter to my parents each time I fail a test. The letter is about "Why did I receive a failing grade on the test". I have folders full of those
letters literally for each test I took, I failed.

I Just felt like I needed to type up my thoughts and personal experiance.

S. juric
St. Petersburg, Florida

wow! i just read your story and was absolutely moved! I'm 15 and have various severe learning disabilities. I really don't have any advice for you, but then again you didn't ask for any so i guess I just wanted to tell you what i think. Okay, I think that what you're going through has got to be common and that there are lots of students out there struggling the same way you are including me. I am about to finish My first year of high school and am going to have to go to summer school to make up classes that I completely failed. Lately I've just given up on acedemics all together because I feel like there is no reason to continue on struggling and putting so much extra time and energy into classwork In middle school I got A's and B's and was absolutely mirserable! I would get so stressed out about acedemics that that was literally all I could think about day in and day out. I was always camparing myself to everyone else and felt so incredibly slow! I have the exact same problem as you when it comes to tests. I can spend hours and hours on homework and get good grades on them, but then when it comes to tests get horrible grades. This totally discourages me too, actually it's discouraged me to the point where I don't even try anymore. Now, I'm probably the biggest slaker out of all my friends and don't even pay attention to my grades anymore. I have lots more I can write about myself, but this is probably getting uninteresting to you so let me just cut to the chase. You are 16 and have hung in there for 6 years now sense you've left Europe. That take a lot of guts and if you hang in there you are going to probably become a great and well-rounded person when you grow up! oh what the hell am i saying, I guess i just think you seem like a really emotionally strong person and I wanted to let you know that for whatever it's worth.
thanks and if you have any advice or questions for me please reply. my email address is aliarae@aol.com