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independent living


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Joined: Nov 03, 2005
Posts: 69140
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Posted Aug 06, 2002 at 6:32:59 PM
Subject: independent living

<HTML>Our 20 year old daughter has severe learning disabilities and is currently enrolled in a program to promote independent living. It is clear, however, that while she can maintain a minimum wage job, she will always need significant financial help because of poor management skills and limited earning potential. An ideal situation would be a community for long-term living that offers independent yet supervised apartment living - the network of friends and public transportation are most important. Does this place exist on the planet?</HTML>

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Anonymous
Joined Jul 26, 2014
Posts: 69140

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Posted:Aug 06, 2002 9:40:14 PM

<HTML>To my knowledge, such places exist only for people with mental retardation. And unless your daughter is mentally retarded, it's not likely she'll qualify.

I could be wrong, of course. Does anyone out there have access to more accurate info than I seem to have?


Yours truly,
Kathy G.</HTML>

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Anonymous
Joined Jul 26, 2014
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Posted:Aug 07, 2002 12:21:56 AM

<HTML>Hi Susie:

In responce to your question about semi-supervised living, if I am understanding your question correctly, I would look into contacting your localstate rep and senator's office because they have been a beacon of light and info on knowing where these homes are. Secondly, you mention limited earning potential. Let me give you some free, sound financial advice here in my realm of expertise as an investment broker/financial consultant. I overcame severe dyslexia and illiteracy in adulthood, despite the lack of family and adequate support services from the government agencies. But the toll of poverty and deprivation I endured in the interim had left their mark on me.

I ended up graduating college magna cum laude w/ my degree in mathematics and then went into the world of investments and Wall St. But I will never forget the dark years of poverty and deprivation I struggled through, all alone, with no help or support.
I know first hand the extreme financial hardships those of us w/ LD face due to limited employment opportunities, due in part, to prevailant discrimination in the workforce. Regardless of whether there is a group home of sorts that meet your daughter's needs, ensuring economic self-sufficiency for her in any living arrangement is paramount in importance.

I do not know what state you and your daughter live in, but I am a licensed broker in PA. However, the following financial principles are applicable to meet concerns and needs of the disabled regardless of state of domicile. I would suggest, if you have the means, to set up a living trust , or maybe even a QTIP trust of sorts to ensure your daughter never has to be hungry, homeless, and suffering from lack of resources to obtain health/dental care. There are several options available that can also provide a tax shelter for you while ensuring your daughter's depending on how much money you have to be able to earmark over the length of her life to ensure she is able to survive. This is very important because you will not always be around and after you pass on, she will most likely still be living.

LD's across all functioning levels face unique financial/economic and social concerns. Often, resources necessary just to be able to live are not readily forthcoming from SSI or other governemtn agencies. Earning opportunities are harder for those of us with LD to come by than the non-disabled.

I know because I have been there. Now I have a career that I am good at, but for yars i suffered in poverty because I had no help and no family to support me. I am a high-functioning LD but I definitely have my share of battle scars and would never wish to see another human being suffer a fraction of what I suffered for lack of money, a caring family, and government support. I want to commend you for being the loving, caring parent that you are in looking out for your disabled daughter. In my opinion, you deserve a Congressional Medal of Honor because being the parent of a disabled child is not an easy road to traverse.

Please feel free to cantact me by email if you would like further explanation on some of the options I have described above. Also, my phone number is (814)337-7611 if calling would be more convenient.</HTML>

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Anonymous
Joined Jul 26, 2014
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Posted:Aug 08, 2002 12:07:38 PM

<HTML>Jacqueline,

Congratulations on your success after overcoming unhappy times. You give great advice that I hope all on line will read. You should post a special message for parents future planning.</HTML>

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Anonymous
Joined Jul 26, 2014
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Posted:Aug 08, 2002 8:56:44 PM

<HTML>hey Im 19 years old, with ld Kids at school make fum of me how i talk .its take me lornger to get things but i get it my real mother thinks im dunb. im in learning surpport classes i like them but im never goin to understand things my friends do in class sometime they ask me 4 help and then they say oh yeh u r in stupit classes if u can have ur daughter email me or im me sometime i need totalk some1 with the same problem that is older

thanks alot dawn</HTML>

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Anonymous
Joined Jul 26, 2014
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Posted:Aug 08, 2002 10:03:02 PM

<HTML>Hi Dawn:

I am 35 and LD, and I endured ridicule from kids and professors in college when I struggled to get the degree our wonderful Social Security system told me to go get.

My heart goes out to you because regardless of age, ridicule and put-downs hurt. Nobody ridicules the diabetic, the epileptic or the paraplegic for their disability but it seems to always be open season on those of us with LD, regardless of age. Perhaps its because predjudice is a thinking disability, and its no secret that brains are like parachutes: they work only when open. It seems to me your "friends" who say cruel things have closed minds and maybe are not worthy of your friendship. A true friend will not make you feel bad about being LD.

The next time one of your friends says "Oh, yeh, you're in the stupid class..." or something like that, after they asked YOU for help with something, I would respond with : " No...I am in the creative thinking classes...because I am smart and see things differently than you, but you being thinking-disabled , you may not understand that..." That should suffice to shut down rude thoughtless and cruel comments from your peers. I would also tell them that being insensitive to your feelings about your disability is a character flaw on their part, where as your disability is NOT a character flaw.

Lastly, I know the pain of not fitting in because of LD. My college experience from age 27 to age 34 brought back all the pain from ridicule and failures from high school. What was worse is that I was paying for college and I did not feel that disability harrassment should have been included in part of my tuition package.</HTML>

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Anonymous
Joined Jul 26, 2014
Posts: 69140

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Posted:Nov 28, 2002 12:08:36 PM

<HTML>If any one lives in South Carolina I need a good independent living and vocational programs for some one who will moving to South Carolina and needs this help as adult that teh should have had long before she.


She needs help in further developing her skills in the travel field i.e a Continuing Education program to gain some sort of certificate in the travel field sicne currently now she words at a very low paying job and has no college degree.

Also a program that can help her benefit from the county finaancial programs for peoplel with disabilties as she needs help finacially. Also a living program that can help to deal with her LD as well as help her ti living independently.


Please e mail me back abotu any serivices or programs that you may know about South Carolina.</HTML>

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