My son is 8 and is diagnosed with NVLD. He is socially immature. He is enjoying himself this summer because there are a few 5 and 6 year old boys in our neighborhood that he likes to play with. They get along pretty well as long as they are running around the yard looking for bugs or playing in the sandbox. The older boys in our neighborhood don’t want anything to do with my son - as do any of the boys in his grade. Should I be working on his social skills with boys his own age? Between his speech delay and slow processing skills, he lacks the ability to communicate and understand social behaviors of his peers. With the next school year approaching, I know he is going to return to playing by himself at recess. It doesn’t seem to bother my son, but I’m sure it will become more important to him in the future. Is it wrong to cater to his immaturity to find playmates?
I think kids should play with who they like to play with. And in neighborhoods kids often play with kids not their age. I think you also need to be working with him on the underlying skills that make it difficult for him to interact successfully with kids his own age.
My own son is socially immature as well. We got him into Boy Scouts for the first time last year. We carefully picked a den, and the boys were a year behind in school. It worked out perfectly for him, and helped develop him socially. He went to day camp this year and one of the boys was waiting for him, wanting to be his partner for the week.
Beth