123 magic is magic!

Just wondered how old your son is and what type of program this is?

This was a great tool for us. It is especially good if you aren’t a consistant dicipliner. It is written in such a reader friendly way. If you choose to spank, you can use it too. The point of the system is that you train your kids to behave in an expected manner. You may have heard this inpublic before. Parents counting and kids stopping bad behavior before they get far. The child acts out and right away you say “ONE” and give them a chance to stop. If they do not stop or they do it again in a certain time period, lets say 20 minutes for sake of arguement, then you say “TWO”. If you get to to “THREE”, it’s a time out or a spank on the tush. This is an especially good way to dicipline for an ADDer because so much of their behav is impulsive. It will teach self control if it’s an impulse. It will teach consequences if it’s bad behavior. In any behavior, it teaches limits and expectations. If your child is oppositional, just counting gives them no ammo. You can’t argue with numbers! You don’t both get caught up in a battle and end up angry.

With some kids this takes longer to work on than others but it can be used on a child as young as three, but it’s never too late to start this. There is the child that will always take his two chances, the other will stop at one. Either way, it’s a great way to dicipline without getting emotional.

I need only call their name and hold up fingers instead of counting out loud. The two most important parts of this are, you can never stop doing it, and both parents have to do it. The year we started, our Kindergarten teacher was usuing it very successfuly and my son caught on very quickly, getting it from all angles!

I never read the book(darn, another “gee, if only Id thought to write that” moment!)

When my teens started the mouthy stage, it cropped up first in public. I know they assumed-correctly-that I woud be embarassed and not wish to make an issue of it

We agreed ahead of time what the consequences would be should I get to 3. Then I simply held up fingers. We initially had to have consequences for the first 3 AND the second 3, but it passed quickly(4 punishments for ds2, I believe, only 1 for ds1)

With teens, I think its partly that you arent getting drawn into the spectacle and excitement they are trying to get going. Calmly holding up fingers just doesnt buy in . Perhaps that follows for add’ers of all ages.

Time frame for us was less than 20 minutes BTW. Those 3 counts were done in five minutes, tops!!!!

Counting is great, there is a clear beginning , middle and end. I have learned a great new trick when the heals are dragging, a stop watch. I bought it at the sports store. Simple one, start, stop and reset buttons, minute and second hands. Its easy for the kids to play with, hoding their breath, racing, putting puzzles together. So when I use it to motivate them, it’s a fun thing, instead of me yelling.

When DS is getting dressed in the morning I was getting tired of standing there prompting him every step of the way. So I left him alone. Then I got tired of stopping my morning routine to poke my head in the room and get him back on task. I started timing him how long it took to get dressed. Almost 20 minutes first morning! We wrote up a little chart and I gave him the stop watch the next morning and told him to “beat his time”. Boy, did that work! It is also good for extending things they do too quickly like brushing teeth. I give him the stop watch and tell him he has to coninually brush his teeth, rinse and spit for 1 full minute. Of coarse it’s the longest minute in the world. I don’t know how long it will last, but he is loving timing him self on things. It has also helped with time perception, something a lot of our kids struggle with.

I loved this Idea. When my husband gets home tonight I’m heading out to get a stopwatch.