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Really depressed, want to cry, not sure where to go - ED kid

Submitted by an LD OnLine user on

Hi All:

I am new here, looking for support/ideas/options/etc.

I am the single parent of a 9 year old boy who has had behavioral and social problems since Kindergarten. I am dealing with crappy insurance (Kaiser), who does not provide regular counseling for my boy, and up until a month ago could not even agree on a diagnosis for my son. They finally came up with ADHD and PDD-NOS, although I am not 100% comfortable with this because I was the one who kept on asking for a diagnosis, telling them they had to help, etc. I think they finally just did it to appease me.

On the other side of the insurance is the school. We are talking about a district who has been out of compliance with me a few times. Principals who bullied my son, school staff who were physical and do not follow the BSP (behavior support plan) THEY put in place.

My son has had problems since the beginning. Really poor social choices, negative attention seeking, tantrums at school when disciplined, no perspective taking, sensory issues (noise of any kind annoys and/or hurts him). His behavior plan worked for awhile but stopped. Consequences rarely work with him.

He has been receiving resource services now for a year and a half (pull out and push in). He was allowed to take breaks when he wanted, but these last few months he has been taking advantage of this and taking a break every hour or so. He is missing out on a LOT of instruction.

My son does relatively well at home. I can normally get him to comply with my requests (unless tired), he is great with my animals, and he helps out and is really funny.

So NOW the school wants to move him to the district’s ED classroom. This room has a therapist, a teacher, and 2 teacher’s aides on staff. It has 13 kids from Kindergarten to Fifth.

I think my son will do well in the smaller classroom because of his sensory issues. But I am concerned about the academics. How will he learn in a classroom that has Kindergartners in it?

The worst thing about all of this is my relationship with my son. He used to be the little boy that I loved and couldn’t wait to see at the end of my work day. Now, I want to cry all of the time and worry about his future, and when we do argue (which is not often) he can go on and on and on emotionally. Like last night I took a ball away from him because he was backtalking me. He was so tired, and cried that he wanted to “sleep with his ball” over and over again for an hour. Which was weird because he has never slept with a ball.

I need some serious help/advice, please. :(

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