What happens when they become adults?

When I see what a hard worker my son is, and what a genuinely nice, ethical person he is, I have no doubt that he is going to do fine in the adult world _IF_ I can get him though school emotionally intact.

O have yet to find anything that he hasn’t been able to learn, when given the time he nees, and taught in a way that makes sense for him.

Karen

This is largely what drives me, my constant quest to help my LD son have a future. Yes, keeping them emotionally intact is a huge part of the picture. We deal with that through honesty, frank conversations about what is fair and what is not and what he can do about it. Otherwise, I make sure he gets an education, that is interesting classes with accomodations. Take steps toward independence, don’t sit and wait for someone to do things for him. Here is the task at hand. How are you going to accomplish it?
Educationally, special education services are available until your child is 22 years old. Then I’m sure other Individuals with Disabilies Acts items kick in. Be hopeful, take small steps, make realistic plans, aim high. My role model is my cousin, a successful attorney, husband, father and also blind. He does not read, but he does everything he needs and wants to. He may do things differently, but he did not settle for less than he was capable of. I try to help my son do the same.

Well, as I’ve mentioned in other threads, in a lot of ways, kids with NLD are very different from kids with language based LD’s. My son is pretty typical of NLD kids in that (at least so far) he does pretty well academically with the right supports and accommodations, and a modest amount of SPED help.

If you look at the adult NLD population, in general they tend to be over-educated for the jobs they hold. It’s life skills and putting what they “know” into practice that’s hard for them. So for us, at least for the time being, I’m letting the school do their part with the academics, while I focus on social skills, life experiences and helping him make connections between what he’s learning, and the real world.

My son is very self-motivated, which from what I’ve been told, is pretty typical of NLD’ers. When he starts to shut down, it’s a sign that he is being overfaced. We’ve seen several times now, that if he starts to balk at schoolwork, and we get the school to back off, he does much, much better.

So in our case, at least for now, our job seems to be to protect him, not push him. I’m sure, though, that this varies greatly from one type of LD to another, as well as being very dependent on the child’s innate personality. The hard thing is for parents to figure out what’s right for their kid!

Karen

Coming out emotionally intact. Couldn’t be a better statement.

I believe you have to make your own enviroment. You know the saying a silk purse out of a sows ear?

Ironicly enough I denied for many years that I had a learning disability,until..
Until I had kids. My own kids,going through and feeling like I did. My Husband too.

Back when I was in special ed. all kids with any type of disability went to the special ed room . Some of us got to leave some of us didn’t.
There were kids there who were mentally retarded,in wheelchairs,blind,no arms. A wide array. My best friend by the way was the blind girl. I used be envious that she could read! She used her hands,and I couldn’t do it with two good eyes.

I believe I developed skills back then to understand that the quality of life is different for everyone. I am now a nurse who works predominately with physically and developmentally delayed children. I have a knack for understanding a nonverbal child,and what they want,without words. I don’t think I would be as successful in my job today if I hadn’t experienced this.
I developed a keen sense of sensitivity for others who are more disabled,or not,depending on which side of the fence your coming from.

My husband also never came out of the closet until he had his kids. He was told he was lazy,unmotivated,wasting a great mind,yadda,yadda.
In some ways I think he was more damged emotionally,because at least I knew,the BIG secret,but at least I knew I was disabled,but my parents expectations were pretty low,so at least I wasn’t told I was lazy,just dumb.

I knew I wasn’t dumb,I always,at some level knew this,so I worked obssesively hard at proven them wrong. Walk, talk, act ,nondisabled.I was real good at faking it,most of the time. I remember bringing a paper I wrote to my father to read. I was gee in 9th or 10th grade. I remember it was a paper I had to write using the concept of socrates teachings. Anyway,socrates used a way of teaching that kind of faked a person into figuring it out for themselves. I never realized until this very moment how appropriate that was! Anyway,my dad read it and looked at me and said,”where did you copy this from?” I was thrilled! It was a great moment for me. I knew if HE thought I copied it,it must be good! I got an A on it. As sad at this might seem to others,sometimes you got to get it where you can,this is what I learned to do.Makes me pretty effective teaching a kid who is too physically disabled to tie their shoes how to use another way right?

When my kids started school and wrote all their letters reversed,had trouble learning to read,I knew why. I knew we were in for a long road.
The one thing I learned from them was to be proud of it. Learn to say,yes I am LD,and I am who I am because I am.

No one seems to pay a lot of attention to the emotionally well being of children. Not enough attention is paid to this area. This can be the biggest barrier to learning of all. If a kid is too anxious that they won’t know the math,they can’t learn it can they?

Once I came out of the closet I was appalled at other people’s attitude. God your not supposed to admit to being disabled,that is something that needs accomodations,something that makes you somehow less.Before anyone knew they either hated or liked my quirky ways.Because I really didn’t LEARN to read until I was 12 or 13 years old,I value anything I read. So much so,that I can hardly bare to part with it. At work we had lockers. About 5 feet tall. Working there ten years I had an awsome selection of articles. On every possible disablity,possible treatments,and possible complications there of.I was suppose to share my locker with another nurse,I always seemed to lose my professional partner,because my reading material would take over the locker! The nurse would move on to another locker,but when anyone needed information,they knew who to come to.. I would no doubt have it:-)

If anyone needed an idea on how to help their patient or communicate with them or make them feel better they knew who to come to.

My hubby? He spent many years doing drugs. A wonderfully creative and talented musician,he self medicated. Dropped out of high school his last semester,what is that? He was almost there! Still don’t understand that!
Anyway,he spent many years proving to everyone that he was in fact wasting a great mind.

We married,what a trip that was! Here we are,a very ADHD male and a very dyslexic female,and we produced children. Whoa,I know. Imagine our dinner table.Spent many stormy years,our kids taught us a lot. About ourselves and how to enjoy life,really enjoy life.

At 45 years old my husband,started his own blues band. He loves it and what a band!! This weekend he is on a weekend gig,loving every minute of it. I am a nurse and an advocate and LD.Love my job,my life and my family. I guess I am still an adult child,so is my husband. But you know what? We weren’t allowed to be children,so with the help of our awsome kids we are still working at growing up…

I know,I know,I should write a book.

Thanks for sharing, Socks. You just validated my feelings that we are on the right track!

Karen

Yes,you sure are! Protect their self esteem at ALL costs.

Socks, and others of us will only say (along the lines of the old cartoon Pogo)… you have met the adult LDers, and they are us! (Not all, but many who visit here are).

Our dyslexic+ son is crossing the bridge to adulthood right now. Turns 20 next month! Me, dyslexic/add + who knows what else, I’m 42, still have plans of growing up and being an adult one day too!

Our boy’s biggest hurdle was self-esteem and self-image during the most damaging years of elementary school. We went thru hell fighting in his behalf, but credit goes to my wife/his mother for pulling him out of that environment and finding him safe haven. Me, I bit into the fight bone, and couldn’t let go for many years. She would take the papers I wrote, understanding what I “thought I was saying”, (I was sure I was), she would scribble all over them, mostly arrows moving words around in a sentance, then give it back to me to re-type. Wow would she get pissed when I’d re-type and “fix things the way I thought they should go”, and then give it back. Major wars over this, seems somewhat trivial now, but during the heat of battling the school and state dept of ed, she finally started to lose patience with me and “it”.

Our son, by high school, seemed to come to grips with understanding he is an LDer, and he is aware of his areas of deficit somewhat. He started to get real defensive about us “hovering”, which is what you grow accustomed to doing when your child’s very life and well being are at stake on a day to day basis. Negotiations were made, deals were struck and day by day, week by week, he weened us off of him, as he wanted to start “doing it” on his own. Then it was him getting pissed with us (usually me) asking him if all homework was complete, any tests to study for… Semester after semester, grades came in consistent, even spiking a few times and making honor roll! By 11th grade, we even stopped the dreaded meet the parents night talks with teachers, except for subjects like math and science. We even learned to scale things back a bit during those too.

Then, one day in 11th grade spanish class, with a teacher we all liked, apparently she poked fun at his handwriting (which is pretty bad) on the chaulk board… Our usually gentle, fun loving, respectful child had a fit in front of all. He yelled at the teacher and asked her why she would make fun of him. Didn’t she know he was dyslexic? Did she even know what dyslexia was? Blah, blah, blah. Anyway, he stormed out of the classroom and waited to get in trouble (for the first time). Instead, teacher came out crying, appologizing and asking him to forgive her. He came home and asked if the school called, when he finally believed us that we had no idea what was going on, with a HUGE grin he told us about the fit and what happened. We lectured him about respecting adults and use the lesson to learn how to not yell or be mean to get the same point across. After he was out of ear shot, we laughed & cried, because we knew he was on the path to being able to advocate for himself. Turning over that mantle (weighty as it was most of the time) was monumental for us. Certainly the battle of wills between him and me decreased significanly, and that was nice. It has never been a problem for me to drop back to the teen year mentality and get into it arguing (my wife might say it’s a problem… ha ha).

Segway to college years. He marched himself right into the counselor’s office prior to signing up at the local jc, and asked to be tested for ld, and that was done. He was sure he wasn’t ld anymore, as the tests were “too easy” and he thought he did “too well”. Anyway, he went back and reviewed results, brought us the paperwork. Ironically, the 30 point discrepancy between performance and achievement are still there, the same areas are an issue, and it for some reason clicked for him and he knew what opportunities lay there for him as a safety net. That was that.

He has since gotten a job, kept it steady for at least 18 months, they schedule his hours around his class schedule every semester. He goes thru the normal gyrations about working with good people, and learning how to deal with @$$es too. Computers and typing most stuff has been a saving grace, by the way. Funny thing is he has a great disposition and he has no fear of talking directly with supervisors and the higher ups.

So, not to wax poetically, it’s kind of like watching a 6’6” 240lb pupa start pushing away the coccoon shell and begin flexing those wings. He’s still at home. I wish he’d learn to do his own wash… someday? Like socks points out, his own sensitivity towards others with disabilities is remarkable, and shows maturity beyond years; I don’t think that can be taught better than through experience and learning what it feels like to be at the abused end of such treatment by others, so you know how it feels.

Me, I’m a senior superintendent for a builder. I’ve worked on large production housing jobs, and also very high end custom homes. I prefer the custom homes, because they are more complex, and I get to flex my people skills muscles more. Everyone in the company teases me about my handwriting and notes that I leave, so I pretty much type everything, except for my log book, which even I can’t read some entries (oh my). I don’t take the teasing quite so personally, as it’s different now that I “am an adult”. I take digital photos of progress and problems and keep a detailed history on my computer at work. My areas of strength fully compensate for my ld areas of weakness. I am fully fluent in spanish verbally, yet never read it or write it. In southern CA, it is the most useful tool I possess by the way. Like sock’s husband, I was a great fan of self-medication for most years from high school up till our son was old enough to be paying attention, then I had to decide if I would lie or just quit it. I’ve picked the path of boredom in this area, a few beers now and again, but mostly coffee (I suppose it’s my over the counter Ritalin).

Anyway, as with most of us, I could go on and on… write the book we all know we could write, but then who would have time to visit this bb if we did???

We pretty much just get older, who is it that determines we grew up? You asked.

Andy

ps/ yeah, I know, posts like this usually awaken Peeved Principal from a sound slumber, so let this postscript be a warning to those of you who have not encountered the scourge of this board… the ever dreaded PP. Be warned, he is not to be taken too seriously, 6” stilleto heels excluded!

At the risk of using a cliche,

He will soar higher then an eagle,because you were the wind beneath his wings:-)

These stiletto heels are tapping. You misspell segue and think yo can call yourself successful? Well, at least your son did not cost my public school anything once you were gone, but I have the satisfaction of knowing that all of you are feeling the scars. I like it even better when like me, you never know who you can really trust and the bitterness of life is what you taste for coffee and you feed on it. I know if you had just stayed in my school things would have worked out fine, but you didn’t trust me or the other experts. You foolish parents!
I get a little worried when your scars aren’t deep enough or your faith is strong enough so that you continue to take risks and help each other but then I realize that I can always always just keep doing my thing, and people who don’t fit The System are a small bunch anyway so even if you find a better way for you there are always the masses who keep trying and keep my paychecks coming! But I keep an eye on you anway!

(And where did Bob the Canadian psych go, anyway?)

Peeved,

You leap for the bait like a mudskipper sliding across the murk and mire, wheezing for air. Truly, you are one of the lowest lifeforms, with an amazing evolutionary history and ability to survive in schools and counties across the country. My misspells serve their ultimate purpose of ticking you off to the point where you yourself mispell and post without checking your own work. You provide me with far too much pleasure, far more than you’d wish… and for that I am appreciative.

Yeah, you swill your coffee with the bile of your own hatred of empowered parents, life in general and what good can come of it. I prefer other blends, but then you’d be hard pressed to find me in your coffee break room anyway; I choose the sunshine far from your heart of darkness. Not because I fear you, or loathe you, but because I choose to. Yeah, that’s right. It is well known you fear choice, alternate options, or any form of competition, because time and time again, you and your cronies prove it beyond a shadow of a doubt… you could never survive in a competitive business market. You’re too shallow, too self serving, too enfatuated with your mail order diplomas to look outside the cold, dank, dark, moldy walls of your beaurocratic web of deceit (known to many as public education system).

You should worry about our strength of character, fanatical love for our children and their well being, our faith, and most of all, the never ending parade of the growing masses who will not accept your beaurocratic dribble and diatribe as gospel. We who you cannot keep apart any longer, share our experiences, our knowledge, and our sagas for the soul/sole purpose of making a stand against what we know is wrong, and what we beleive can be changed for the better. For if it cannot be changed, it should be dismantled and abolished. Sadly, that would end your illustrious career, cut short your pension, and plans for a boring, miserable, hate filled retirement in a home for @hole @dministrators. (Just imagine the irony there, when they bring in children and puppies to visit with you, and you’ll be paying for the visits instead of recieiving your prescious salary.)

Just as well you should keep your eye on us, we’re not going anywhere.

As far as “what about Bob” (It was a funny movie); can’t say that I know, haven’t seen him on the bb for quite some time.

Many thanks for the chuckles, you always make my day!

Best regards :)

Andy

Don’t you worry, the m@sses of @sses still think We Know Best!!!! Oh, sure, there are more homeschoolers but they are too busy arguing over evolution with each other, and all you private school people who are in your insulated world.
By providing a lousy education I can ensure that they will never have the literacy skills or the thinking skills to depose me. They are far more worried about getting the right sneakers and lobbying for more Pepsi an dCOke machines in the lunch rooms. I love Channel One! Teach them right, from the start! Salesmanship comes from the heart!

Hmm,It has always intrigued me as to who you really are. I think I figured it out:-)

Peeved,is like an old Aunt who is part of the family, but is hateful,spiteful,and negative.
For those on this board who might not know, Peeved as been around a long time.An altered ego,that one is welcome to imagine is your principal,or your school district ESE director,as I did,a few years ago. Jeez,it has been a few years. Let’s see,at least three years. Anyway Peeved serves a purpose,he makes you mad,and he gives you the freedom to say just exactly what you want to say,but could never say to your own principal,or in my case, director.

The red stiletto heels,I don’t even know if Andy knows how much visualizing stiletto heels,empowered me. I frequented the board in search of fighting my school district to get my kids educated. Just as most of us here, do. Peeved was on and made some really annoying statements,don’t even remember what he said. Funny how unimportant his comments really are. But the stiletto heels,LOLOL.
I swear this is true,a couple days after Andy told peeved he was really a she and wore red stiletto heels,or something like this. I had a extremely stressful meeting planned with the director of ESE,taped,with an advocate. Well let me tell you,I couldn’t help but laugh sitting there in this nightmare of a situation,because I had this urge to look under his desk,just to see if he was wearing red stiletto heels! What a stress reliever it was,and Andy,god bless you friend, you gave me the strength of humor to help me through a difficult situation.

And peeved gave me the freedom to dump all my anger out on him,so when I went into this meeting I was ready. I could be matter of fact,professional,and amused all at the same time.

Well Peeved we ran into each other again didn’t we? I know you were relieved to see me leave the public school system. God I scared you didn’t I? After the state made my four state complaints, a mega complaint, you had 22 pages of allegations to try and cover up. Yup 22,I know this is hard to talk about my friend but, I gave you a run for your money,earned it this time.Spent a few restless nights,I am quite sure. I will never forget the look on your face when I asked you for the file you had on my son.Yup,a file of all our meetings together,you never saw it coming,but you were on tape,gee how could you refuse? You tried,got real red in the face,but there it was,plainly marked with my last name on it. You asked,what do you want in it? I smiled,thinking of red stiletto heels and said,”gee I don’t know,all I know is I have a right to any file kept on my child,so I just want it copied,give it all to me and I will look it over at home.” I could just imagine the meds you had to take that night. But after a couple of years,you thought I would never bother you again,but I suppose you were wrong. We ran into each other last week,the look on your face was reminiscent of that day in your office. I was representing LDA,you were just too worried about why I was there. You sent someone over,they took a look,nothing but LDA stuff. What they didn’t see was the policy the school board approved, you know the one not being giving to parents? You know the policy that states an educational eval. can be no more than 60 days? Of course I brought it and made 50 or so copies,you just didn’t give me enough time to put it out there on the table yet:-) Sure enough you came over in person,looking things over,and made such a political mistake it reminded me of stiletto heels. You aknowledged my existence. I know it hurt,I know you really didn’t want to,but in order to make sure you knew what I was up to,you had to didn’t you? The thing you want to preserve at all costs is the idea that parents are not a bother,parents are not important enough for you to remember who they are or what they want. As hurtful as it was to you,it gave me a little pleasure. Yeah you know who I am, and you had to admit it.OUCH!
Then you saw that memo,wow,your face can get pretty red.You said not a word,you walked away. Poor thing,need a bathroom? Heels?
Don’t get too comfortable,we are still around,we are still watching you…

socks! Great description! Great job with your district and the accomplishments you’ve made! Tremendous courage and effort can often bring great results! I don’t watch the stock market much, but your actions coincide with the huge spike in profits for that famous pink liquid, Pepto Bismal. Or is it dismal?

You know it’s hard to imagine in weight, but when you add up the sleepless nights worrying about your child, the anxiety of walking to your mailbox and wondering what lays there in wait for you, the frustrating meetings and all the other madness that one encounters down the merry path of childhood education for some people’s children, does it not somehow balance out when you see that you really have made an impact on the system? I don’t really know, but I do know that the flushed face look you describe on your administrator, the speechless rage that must be broiling inside him/her… at the very least cause(s/d) a sever case of upset stomach, the runs and hopefully some life reflection time on the porcelain throne from which they (think they) rule!

Yes, Peeved is the ultimtate imaginary adversary in our little Don Quixote world of battling the windmills of education. Some, no many, if not all who know those of us who have taken on the system sit back and wonder why we do what we’ve done. They say taking on a system is suicide, and you’ll never win and such stuff. Peeved is the foe on which you can sharpen your sword, practice your swing, take out your agressions and with some well placed pecks at the key board, you can even really tick the cross dressing, stilletoe wearing fella off (can’t we P? :)

What is most amazing, is Peeved’s evolution came out many years ago, each of us has been sideswiped by his horrid behaviors and comments. For all the people who post here, for all the different stories that have come from across the country and litterally from around the world, the essence of Peeved lives strong in most if not ALL of our school districts! Rare is the district with competant administrators who encourage teachers and parents to get involved and support the protection and development of children, particularly the ld children who do not fit into the system’s programs; or God forbid fit into the placements made available. The irony is Peeved grates on the nerves of any and all of us who post here simply because he’s imaginary here, but exists everywhere. Kind of like a real life Freddy Kruger? How can that be? I’ve often wondered about a clandestine brotherhood/sisterhood of administrators that must go away (like to 6th grade camp), where they are indoctrinated in the manner of Peeved personafied.

Anyways, once again, just wanted to applaud you socks on your efforts and the headway you’ve made. If given the chance, I know you’d knock a 1/2 inch off one of Peeved stilletoes just to watch him limp (and hopefully trip down a nice long flight of stairs). Hmmmmmmmm

As always :)

Andy

Ahh but he is limping:-) Maybe not due to those heels,but possibly a wicked inflamation of his hemorrhoids.Poor soul..

Funniest thing is,
1. The policy,it was approved by our county school board,as resolution to an office of civil rights complaint.Filed in 96 by a frustrated,a peeved mom:-)Yup ,hell she didn’t even know what she was doing back then,all she knew was kids were waiting 18 months to be evaluated.If she filed the complaint on behalf of all the students waiting,then they would see the waiting list. The state she lives in does not have a timeline for completion of evaluations,nope. The ONLY district in her state to have a timeline,was because of a civil rights complaint filed 6 years ago by a Mother from hell.
2. I am helping a parent right now who has been denied the right to sign the consent for evaluation. Yup,you guess it,once the consent was signed the 60 days timeline starts.Sooo,what does my peeved principal do,he dons his stiletto’s and tells his staff,”whatever you do don’t let the parent sign consent.” So we wrote a letter giving consent for evaluation,along with the letter we send a memo from the superintendent of schools explaining the complaint resolution plan, the district would intiate eval. within 30 days from the day the parent gives consent,and 60 total to completion of the eval to eligibility meeting.This memo was dated 6/97.
3. 4/2000 another memo was sent out from the Asst. superintendent to directors,this memo reiterated the policy,and requested that they give this information to staff and parents,well his stiletto wearing self isn’t even giving it to the school staff. The school psych nor the principal was even remotely aware of it. Personally I would be outraged,if I were them.
4. And so as the story is told,the director saw his memo once again,upon the table of a Mother from Hell:-)

Fighting windmills,yup,exactly.

Thanks for sharing. I am not LD. Neither is my husband. Or anyone else in either of our families. We have been thrust into a world that is very different from any of our experiences. I was the nerdy kid who learned everything in school easily and read a book while doing it. Having my son has opened my eyes to a whole new world and changed me in the process, for the better. But I will never have the level of understanding that someone who has been through the experience themself has.

Beth

Andy & Socks,

Undoubtly, your books would be wonderful truly and insight and inspiration to us all.

Ever since the psyco. told us when our son was barely 5 yrs. old that he can’t learn like other people but could probably grow up to be a plumber. I still don’t know what kind of derogatory statement towards plumbers that was supposed to be. This mom was over the edge my husband was afraid of what I might say to everyone. How dare anyone tell us our son can’t do anything he wants.

Anyway, as much as I worry since he is almost 10 and we have a long haul I know my son is so special a truly nice person, works very hard, good sense of humor and yes he can fly.

P.S. Fine with me if he is a plumber if that is his choice God knows our old house always needs work.

You are not Peter. Your syntax is wrong.

I’d be happy if my son could be a plumber!!! Unfort. he seems to have inherited all the visual-spatial weaknesses from both sides of the family (don’t ask me about my husband’s plumbing—I now call the plumber before he starts rather than afterwards). This would be OK, since the rest of us are all gainfully employed, except that he has language based deficits too which make it less likely that he can succeed in the academic realm as we have. I worry about him a lot. He would be a farmer in another age (he loves plants) and do just fine but short of a huge unexpected inheritance, that won’t happen.

Beth

Hi Beth,

We have 24 ac. farm and raise pigmy goats my son loves taking care of kids and is a big help in the barn. We have 3 horses too.

Since we know alot of farmers can say that there are more farmers needed. I think our son’s first job will probably be up the road at the dairy farm.

Anne

Wow! My son would love that. We live in an urban area where land is expensive. We have a small backyard which has three gardens in it: a butterfly one for my daughter, and two vegetables gardens—one for each son. My 9 year old LD son has pots of palm plants all over the yard as well. He may not remember all the sounds of the letters but he knows all the names of palm trees! Now he has started collecting cactuses. My husband is a horticularalist so he comes by all of this honestly.
My son regularly complains that we ought to move to an adjoining suburb which has one acre lots. These town was agriculatural before it became urbanized and has wanted to preserve its rural character by requiring large lots. The end result is expensive houses!!! Of course, we can not afford these houses but that doesn’t seem to deter him from carrying on about it constantly!!

He has told us he wants to move to central florida where they have citrus, cattle, and more land!!

Beth

As you all know, I work in the construction industry. A plumbing contractor that we work with on some rather large custom homes usually doesn’t schedule any work on Fridays for himself (he has some employees that work), but he goes golfing every Friday. Calls it his “therapy”. I generally kid with him about who he plays with; I assume it’s mostly Doctors, and of course, other Plumbers. What an ignorant person to say something so deragatory towards any profession, I would more safely presume that an innefective psych is a far more demeaning line of work :( Anyway, just my two cents about plumbers…

Andy

As one who lives in area where all the plumbers who had any talent were down in Miami post Hurricane Andrew when our house was built, I can attest to the difficulties of an ineffective plumber or two!

Ineffective psychs—well I have met those also!!

At least your shower doesn”t leak into your family room with an ineffective psych!!

Beth

Yes, I do believe you; but fixing the pipes and cleaning the mess, as I’m sure you’ll agree, is easier done than years of battling against inaccurate diagnosis and damage control to a child’s damaged self esteem.

Go figure. If the contractor were brought before the contractor’s boad for shoddy worksmanship, they would be penalized, possibly lose their license, or at least be put on probation… what happens to an innefective psych?

In my experience, the plumbers get away with shoddy work too (we have lived in this house 2 1/2 years- we have spent $5,000 fixing plumbing that was never done right to start with—and the house was built in 1993). The big difference is my pocketbook is just a lot more empty—while ineffective psych types can play havoc on a child’s life. That can be, as I am sure you agree, hard to remedy no matter how much money you have.

Beth