Skip to main content

working too hard

Submitted by an LD OnLine user on

Hi everyone,

I haven’t written in a while, but as usual, I have been reading posts from time to time. I just returned home from curriculum meeting at my son’s school. It is a very nice, small international school in Japan. Very into educating the whole brain—certainly what he needs given that his left brain is gifted and the right needs a boost…..

I don’t know…the whole thing just got me down. I am very worried b/c I don’t think their math program is structured enough…but they are doing plenty of computation–various methods for long division and multiplication—he needs the practice — so I guess I am pleased with that. They have also been doing quick math multiplication facts everyday —20 multiplication problems—timed—once at school and once nightly for homework. It only takes 1 or 2 minutes. It was my idea that got the teacher to start doing this b/c my son really needs the practice…and she thought it might be good for everyone. Well the class has been at it since November and all the kids are down to 30 seconds or less and my poor little guy gets between 1 and 1 min 30, except for the one time earlier this week when he came in at 58 seconds.

Here we are in February and they haven’t even discussed fractions, decimals, geometry—perimeter, area, circumference, volume and all that wonderful 5th grade stuff. So I purchased the University of Chicago Everyday Math program to do with him at home and he is pretty good at it. I realize some of you like that program and some do not–he was lucky to have a really great teacher last year (at a different school) and he has got a good grasp of the stuff, he gets all the concepts…it is only the speed of computation that is an issue. The problem is that I cannot stand to see him work so hard. All this WORK WORK WORK. I know his school is not covering the topics he will need to know when we go back to the US, so I feel I must keep going with the math, but will this ever end??? When will he be able to take it easy?

If you could see him. He is just adorable…handsome. funny, happy, he just takes it all and puts in 300% more than everyone else with hardly a complaint. It shouldn’t be this way.

This summer he is going to camp. He will have an hour a day of academics and the rest will be FUNFUFNFUN.

Thanks for reading my rant.
Ciao,
Margo S

Submitted by Anonymous on Thu, 02/13/2003 - 6:05 PM

Permalink

Margo -

What I am going to propose might surprise you. I am going to suggest that you let the concern about accuracy and speed of basic math facts go. Try to get an IEP accommodation that lets him use a calculator so he can verify any of the math facts any time he needs to.

My son experienced a significant delay in learning basic math facts, particularly addition and subtraction. Each time he saw 9 + 2, it was just as new for him the 100th time as it was the 1st time. At about age 12, the basic math facts finally kicked in for him. I am just a mom, not a psychologist, but I’ve come to think that for LD kids, some abilities just will not be there until their brains go through another development stage that enables them to make new connections. I have the impression that there are significant brain development phases between 10 and 12 and again around 16.

When your son has to go over the math facts repeatedly, never as successfully as his peers, he is getting a very negative message about his progress and his capabilities. Yet some kids like this are highly capable of grasping more advanced math concepts, including algebra. This is described nicely in the book (whose name I always mix up) “Right-Brained Child in a Left-Brained World.”

He’ll get the basic math facts eventually, so there’s just no reason to make it the focus of his work. I’d try to encourage the teacher to move on to other (more interesting!) 5th grade math operations, so your son can find that he can be successful at more complex math tasks. I think it’s wonderful that you’ve been doing other math activities on your own with him. It will really pay off for him later.

Submitted by Anonymous on Thu, 02/13/2003 - 7:01 PM

Permalink

AJ,

Words of wisdom!!!! My boys are having the same problems with math facts and we are being told, DRILL, DRILL, DRILL is best for committing facts to memory (but I say that strategy is not for everyone). All we are seeing is anxiety, not improvement.

I do just that. I let them use the calculator at home. I believe that you are so right, it will eventually come automatically. But when, who knows? In the meantime, I can’t see torturing these kids. Let’s get on with other things.

It is so funny that you mention the developmental stage of 10-12 connections. My middle guy was doing just horrible last year. He is now 10 1/2 and things that he would melt down over last year, are just “clicking” now and I wondered how could there be such a dramatic difference?

Thanks for your insightful thoughts.

Submitted by Anonymous on Thu, 02/13/2003 - 7:51 PM

Permalink

Interesting, yes. But the example given was ADD, not LD.

My boys have significant memory issues. I do not believe that continuing to beat them up or prevent them from moving on to more advanced concepts is going to EVER solve this problem.

Fluency is “really nice” if you are a neuro-typical child. I have problems in mental math. Always have, always will. I know the facts, I just need time to write them down if they are more than I digit. I did those horrible drills as a child. All I remember about those drills, was not being allowed to move up (being stuck at the “slow table” forever) and STOMACHACHES. At 36, I would still be at the slow table. I know the facts, I just am not fluent. I did long division, I passed algebra and geometry.

I just do not think it is worth the torment at this time in their lives. Sorry.

Submitted by Anonymous on Thu, 02/13/2003 - 9:06 PM

Permalink

Agreed. We just really have to get out of this thinking that there is only one way to get to any one particular destination.

Submitted by Anonymous on Fri, 02/14/2003 - 3:08 AM

Permalink

Thanks for your reply aj.

It is funny that you say that about brain development. I have seen it time and time again….really, it is what keeps me plugging away. He just can’t get something, with all the practice in the world….Then, when we are not even working on it…boom…he gets it.

I hear different ages all the time…….. I am not sure which it will be for him, but I saw it at age 9 in a big way and again after IM. Perhaps at 12 or 13 we will see it again. He is getting it…..just later.

He is on his own developmental timetable and I MUST ACCEPT THAT!!! I know I must, but I keep on pushing more and more.

I must say that IM is directly responsible for his improved coordination. He is great at the dinner table, uses chopsticks proficiently!!!! and rarely spills! So that is one therapy that had direct and immediate results. I want him to do it again this summer to work on his lower body…but I think he needs a bit of fun and some time away from his slave-driving mom.

Ciao,
Margo

Submitted by Anonymous on Fri, 02/14/2003 - 11:18 AM

Permalink

I don’t know if I will add to your burdens or take away from them but why is speed of computation essential? Rapid mental calculating is something that comes naturally to some people but not to everybody, including me. SATS allow the use of calculators.

In any case, I agree with you that work can take up too much of a young child’s life and wish you and your son the great summer you clearly deserve!

Submitted by Anonymous on Fri, 02/14/2003 - 12:06 PM

Permalink

My daughter (age 10) says, “Just b/c you don’t get the answer FIRST doesn’t mean you don’t KNOW the answer”.

Submitted by Anonymous on Fri, 02/14/2003 - 1:25 PM

Permalink

Leah–what your daughter said made my night…
Thanks everyone for responding and helping me put it in perspective.

Ciao,
Margo

Submitted by Anonymous on Fri, 02/14/2003 - 2:04 PM

Permalink

We have spent the past four or five months working on multiplication fluency, using a long process that started with skip counting to a metronome.. I totally agree with this author and my son has severe LDs including memory issues. He now has all the multiplication tables down very fluently except 8’s—and it really is only 8x 3 that he gets mixed up sometimes.

I just decided I was going to do any thing possible to make him learn his multiplication tables. I know that eventually he could get a modification of using a calculator but he is in fourth grade and there would be a lot of failure before that was allowed. His self esteem takes enough of a beating with reading and I didn’t want the same to happen with math.

And actually, we got a lot more milage from doing this than we have for the same time spent on reading activities.

Beth

Submitted by Anonymous on Sat, 02/15/2003 - 12:32 AM

Permalink

These kids really have lots of good stuff to teach us.

She was aggravated b/c her 3rd grade teacher kept telling her to study her multiplication facts b/c “Mom, I always have to sit down first when we do the math facts drills”. That’s when she came up with that answer. I always say that no one CARES how long it takes for a scientist to come up with a theory or cure a disease as long as you get the result you need. He gets the SAME amount of credit.

Back to Top