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I have a question about how to handle my son’s attitude. He is a very caring boy with a big self esteem problem. He only puts out half effort in school and in sports, due to deciding ahead of time that he does not fit in or can not do it. I need a positive way of handling this with him, knowing he has consequences of his actions. He has a learning disorder in language arts and ADHD. I’m not sure of what help to give him. I just hate to see him falling in a depression.

You must clarify why your son is so discouraged that he appears to have given up. If he has ADHD and a learning disability and if he has not been fully treated for one or both of these serious disabilities, the behaviors and attitudes you see may be a result of his feelings of frustration and failure. His poor self-image and low self-esteem concern me as well.

First, meet with the professionals who are working on his ADHD and LD and explore if each is fully addressed. If not, implement the needed help. Also, have him evaluated by a mental health professional who understands ADHD and LD. Act quickly before you lose him.

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