evaluators' confllict of issues with child/stepchild

I’m very sorry to hear about this, and I can’t be of any real help. Often, an ADD “evaluation” is simply a check-list of items which are checked off by people who know the child. Usually a teacher would be one of the contributors as well as both parents. ADD evaluation is so subjective, that I don’t see that the “location” of the “test” is the problem. The problem is whether you feel your children should never be given any medication without your consent. Are you allowed to take them to the doctor and get prescriptions without your ex-husband’s approval?

What does he say to the sudden weight loss? Isn’t he concerned that the medication might be causing it? I believe that weight loss from stimulants and anorexia are two totally different things, so I am not sure you can say that the Concerta causes anorexia (I’m no expert on either, however). It certainly causes weight loss in some children, though. Can’t she simply not take the medication when she is at your house? She should be able to tell whether it is helping her focus better or whether it is doing nothing at all. What does she say?

Janis

What do the school folks have to say about this?

I would call whatever advocacy groups were in my area… and *document, document, document.*

A couple thoughts: First, if you think she doesn’t have ADHD, why not have her looked at by an expert who can say that the diagnosis is incorrect. Second, if she does have ADHD and both you and your ex agree that medication is appropriate, there may be choices that won’t affect her appetite so severely that could be explored. Again, an expert would a good place to go for guidance. Third, I think your ex was totally out of line to test and medicate without your agreement, but a court might not think so unless you spelled out in your custody agreement that both parents need to notify and, where feasible and appropriate, obtain the consent of the other to medical treatment. Finally, Concerta does not cause anorexia nervosa, which is a psychological illness. It does have as a side effect “anorexia” which is simply a medical term for loss of appetite. Most children will initially lose weight on the medication. For some it levels off, for others it doesn’t. But, “anorexia” and “anorexia nervosa” are not the same thing.

Is that you, Rover? Or some other really on-the-ball soul…?

Who is your child’s pediatrician or who has been your family doctor? I’d consider turning to that person with the issue. If your family was seeing a physician your husband held in regard, he might be willing to listen to their input.

Good luck with this difficult situation.

[quote=”Sara”]Who is your child’s pediatrician or who has been your family doctor? I’d consider turning to that person with the issue. If your family was seeing a physician your husband held in regard, he might be willing to listen to their input.

Good luck with this difficult situation.[/quote]
My daughter’s pediatrician is a friend of ours and he wrote the script. Member of our synogogue known him for years. He knew and I told him of my rights that are equal to my ex husband/physician to physician rights. So, he is no one to turn to and he knows how I felt and feel..I don’t know who renews her script. My biggest problem is his doctor status and the power he throws around with this as his armour!

Perhaps you should contact your family law attorney as far as giving medication without your consent.

and both parties disagree about how these ADD issues should be dealt with. I have seen parents of children who are ADD themselves, not married and observe how they disagree about how to treat their child who has the same malady.

One is begging for meds and the other doesn’t want it because he/she doesn’t understand that even though he/she has learned to deal with his/her ADD their child needs help. But what they forget is that the child isn’t them and sometimes in situations such as this the kid becomes a pawn in a tug of war.

Once I realized my children had ADD and realized I too had similiar issues I got help as did my children and it has made a world of difference in our life and in our family relationships. I have become a lot more patient and tolerant with people who have ADD and are stuck where I once was.

Well, that does present a different picture. If her own pediatrician wrote the prescription, he must have had evidence that he thought an ADD diagnosis was a valid possibility. Why would any of them want her on medication if they did not seriously think ADD was an issue?

Janis